The Meatmen - We're The Meatmen...And You Suck! (1983)

If you thought that this blog had any self-respect, then you'll probably change your mind with this post. Rather than posting some Michael Jackson or The Seeds after the death of Sky Saxon, I'm choosing to post We're The Meatmen...And You Suck!

The Meatmen are a punk/hardcore band hailing from Lansing and Detroit, MI and have a reputation for having a really crude and offensive sense of humour. For example, the title of their second LP and a song on this album, is Crippled Children Suck. There is also Pope On A Rope. This is their first full LP, and it was released in 1983. The Meatmen also spend a fair amount of time making fun of homosexuals, as one might notice on the first track. I can't decide how serious all of this is, as they make fun of themselves quite a bit, too, like when Tesco Vee (the headman of the everchanging band) recites the lyrics to "I Sin For A Living" as if they are poetry, or on "Crippled Children Suck" where he is just screaming incoherently. Ironically, Tesco Vee was a fourth grade teacher. The lead guitarist in Rock and Roll Juggernaut was also my 11th grade history teacher. And the guitarists in War of the Superbikes are some ex-Minor Threat characters.

I don't really recommend any of the tracks. As a whole, it's a fun listen every now and again, but most of the charm of The Meatmen lies in their offensive jokes, horrible lyrics, and self-deprecation. The first side of the record is the Blood Sausage EP, while the second side is filled with "the jammin' live tunes recorded at The Mudd Club and other various holes". My favourite parts of these live tunes are the reluctant applause and the occasional lone scream from a man in the crowd. This is a really long write-up.

Lineup: Vocals - Tesco Vee; Guitar - Greg Ramsey, Rich Ramsey; Bass - Rich Ramsey, Mike Achtenburg; Drums - Mr. X, Berl Johnson;

Track Listing:

Side One

1. The Rap

2. Tooling For Anus

3. 1 Down 3 to Go

4. Snuff 'Em

5. Becoming A Man/Freud Was Wrong

6. Ive Got A Problem

7. I'm Glad I'm Not A Girl

8. Dumping Ground

Side Two

9. Meatmen Stomp

10. Mr. Tapeworm

11. Orgy of One

12. I Sin for A Living

13. Crippled Children Suck

14. Buttocks

15. Middle Aged Youth

16. Meat Crimes

The Meatmen - We're The Meatmen...And You Suck! (1983) - 320kbps

The Purple Toads - Love Songs for the Hard of Hearing (1988)

Finally! Some more Can-Con! The Purple Toads hail from the beautiful, the desirable, Oshawa, Ontario. They formed after their old band, Durango 95, fell apart in 1985 and then they recorded a self-titled album in 1986. Their only other album is this one, Love Songs for the Hard of Hearing from '88. They didn't get very good reviews, grouped in with the rest of Oshawa's drunken garage-rock scene, maybe because of lines like "Well you got the kind of body that makes me come alive, but I'd rather have my hand wrapped 'round a bottle of Colt 45", but I find them to be some good rock and roll. "Troubled Mind" is a particularly good track. Other than that, there are a couple of covers - one of John D. Loudermilk's "Tobacco Road", which isn't stellar, and a cover of "What A Way to Die" by The Pleasure Seekers, a 1960's female garage-rock band from Detroit. The singer also has a funny sounding lisp that comes out sometimes.

Lineup:
Guitar - Paul MacNeil and Rob Sweeney; Bass - Roger Branton; Drums - Mark Keigan; Vocals - Rob Sweeney

Track Listing:
Side One
1. Wildtime
2. All I Want
3. What A Way to Die
4. Troubled Mind
5. You Gotta Believe Me
6. Love's All Gone
Side Two
7. Don't Understand Your Love
8. Ain't No Friend of Mine
9. Love On Your Back
10. Too Much of You
11. Tobacco Road
12. Everybody

The Purple Toads - Love Songs for the Hard of Hearing (1988) - 320kbps

Alex Chilton - No Sex EP (1986)

Alex Chilton is a badass. Look at him, he's on his car. He's against a wall. I'm actually starting to think that this entire blog is an excuse to post Alex Chilton. He is the singer in The Box Tops and Big Star. He is a man.

"No Sex" is a pretty funny look at AIDS, far before AIDS was funny (1986). "No sex, not anymore" being the constant refrain. Chilton also maintains that "Pretty soon, we're all gonna get it". Very bleak. Very Serious.

You should also listen to "Under Class" and "Wild Kingdom". But I guess if you download this, you don't have much choice.

Track Listing

Side One

1. No Sex

2. Under Class

Side Two

3. Wild Kingdom

Alex Chilton - No Sex EP - 1986 - 320kbps

Mott the Hoople - All the Young Dudes (1972)

Some of you might think that you've never heard these guys before, but when the title track comes on, you'll realize that you've listened to them at least 20 times in a row whilst trying to destroy "All the Young Dudes" on expert in Guitar Hero. You may hate them for it. Or at least I did. Anyways, aside from all that, this album was produced by David Bowie in 1972. Actually, David Bowie is most of the reason that Mott the Hoople became successful at all. He is the one that wrote "All the Young Dudes", and he is also the one that transformed the bands image into that of glam rockstars, or so allmusic leads us to believe. On kind of a crazy note, though, David Bowie had originally given Mott the Hoople "Sufragette City", but they rejected it, and then Bowie had to go and make it a hit.

But "All the Young Dudes" shouldn't be the entire focus of the album. The rest of the songs are also pretty good. For example, there is a sweet cover of Velvet Underground's "Sweet Jane". And "Momma's Little Jewel" and "Jerkin' Crocus" are rockin'.

Oh yeah, Bowie plays sax on this album, too.

Track Listing:

Side One

1. Sweet Jane

2. Momma's Little Jewel

3. All the Young Dudes

4. Sucker

5. Jerkin' Crocus

Side Two

6. One of the Boys

7. Soft Ground

8. Ready for Love/After Lights

9. Sea Diver

Mott the Hoople - All the Young Dudes - 320kbps